• I am not really running / cycling fit at the moment as they disappear into the distance.
  • I am so never ever running / cycling a marathon / half marathon / trail run / MTB event again.
  • I do not have more than one pair of running tackies in my cupboard at any given time.
  • I do not have more than one bicycle in my garage at any given time.
  • I will gladly give up my run / cycle to help you with your homework or mom’s taxi you to where ever you need to be.
  • I don’t mind if you come past me, even if i left you behind a few km’s ago.
  • No, you don’t smell (in the car on the way home from an event).
  • I spend less on event entry fees a month than on my children’s school fees / groceries / rates and taxes.
  • My bicycle cost less than my car.
  • My bicyle does not sleep in the bed next to me.
  • My mood is in no way affected or altered by the fact that i have not managed to run / cycle today.

Happy running / cycling all and remember if a helpful marshall on the side of the road during an event tells you that the finish is just around the corner / only one more uphill to go / you are nearly there you might not want to believe them.